



Amakhasi Olutsha
UNGCELELE LWESONDO
Ndiyaguqu-guquka!
URonald Xulu wazalelwa kwidolophana yakwaZulu/ Natal. Uthi wakhula ekhanuka amanye amadoda. Uthi kwakunzima kwiminyaka yobutsha bakhe kuba kwakungekho mntu anokumxelela ngeemvakalelo
zakhe. Nali ibali lobomi bakhe.









Ukukhanuka abantu abafana nawe untsundu kubi ngaphezu
kocalucalulo.

Ndazalelwa eLadysmith ngo-1 967. Abazali bam abafundanga yaye babambelele kwizithethe. Ndiyinkulu ekhaya kubantwana abane; intombazana enye namakhwekhwe amabini.

Esemncinane uRonald wayekuthanda ukuhlala namadoda njengamanye amakhwenkwe. Ndandithanda ukuhamba notata ndisemncinane. Ndandikuthanda ukuhlala naye, nokuya kwiindawo ngeendawo nabahlobo bakhe. Nkqu nasesikolweni ndandisoloko ndihleli namakhwenkwe
- ndiwabukela xa edlala.

Uqale xa eneshumi elivisayo Ieminyaka ukuba nengxaki ngokubhekiselele kwinkanuko yakhe yesondo. Yayinzima gqitha loo minyaka kum. Ndaqaphela ukuba andifani namanye amakhwenkwe. Ndandingenantombi ndincuma nayo. Into eyeyisenzeka kukuba ndandikhanuka amanye amakhwerikwe.

Ngelo xesha wayehlala eLadysmith yaye kungekho mntu anokucela uncedo kuye. Ndandingenalwazi ngobomi bomntu okhanuka abantu abafana naye yaye ndandicinga ukuba kuyinto embi. Andizange ndixelele mntu ngento eyayisenzeka kum.

* Akabizwanga ngegama lakhe lokwenene -basachukelwa abantu abakhanuka abantu abafana nabo. Ukuze sikhusele usapho nabahlobo, sibone ukuba masingalibhali igama lokwenene likaRonald.
Xa ndicinga ngaloo minyaka ngoku ndiyaqonda ukuba ndandinako ukuzinceda. Uzalwa unayo into yokukhanuka abantu abafana nawe. Andizange ndiyifunde yaye andizange ndinyanzelwe kuyo. Yazenzekela into yokukhanuka abantu abafana nam.

Ngelo xesha, usapho nabahlobo bakaRonald babesithi makazifumanele amantombazana anokuncuma nawo. Ukuze bonwabe wazifumanela intombazana engumhlobo wakhe
- intombi awayeza kuhamba nayo apho kufuneka abantu bahambe ngababini.

Wathi uRonald xa enama-21 eminyaka waya eThekwini eyoqhubela phambili imfundo yakhe. Ndavuya gqitha. Ndandiqala ukufumana abantu abafana nam nabo abakhanuka abantu abafana nabo ngesini. Kwandenza ndakhululeka oko akukho nto iphosakeleyo kum, bakhona abantu abafana nam.
Usapho nenkxaso yalo
URonald akukho mntu ukhe amxelele kusapho lwakowabo ukuba ungumntu okhanuka amanye amadoda. Uthi abazali bakhe abanakuyiqonda imeko yakhe. Ndicinga lakufika ixesha lokuba uthi pahaha yonke intoi, kufuneka kube lixesha elifanelekileyo yaye uyithi pahaha loo nto ebantwini abafanelekileyo. Andidli ngakubabona abazali bam kuba kaloku ndihlala eThekwini. Abantu endibonana nabo nento endiyenzayo ayibuchaphazeli ubomi babo.

Ndiyakholwa ukuba babekhona abantu abanjengam nasekukhuleni kwabazali bam. Ngokwesithethe sethu amadoda ayakhuthazwa ukuba asoloko endawonye. Kodwa asithethi ngezo zinto okanye ngokuba kunokwenzeka ntoni.

Xa abazali bam benokuva ukuba ndikhanuka amanye amadoda, bangothuka gqitha

Andikeva mntu ukhe wavuma ukuba unjalo eLadysmith -kungothusa abantu
abaninzi.
Sinosapho olusondelelene gqitha. Xa ndiluxelela ingxaki yam lunokungayamkeli.











URonald uthetha ngobomi bakhe ekowabo eThekwini. Ukuze angaziwa ngabantu asibuvezanga ubuso bakhe kweli nqaku.
Kumfundi
okhanuka abantu abafana naye nozivezileyo, ncedani abantu
abafana nani ukuze baziqonde iinkanuko zabo
zesondo.
Ningazenzi
bhetele nina. Zamani ukubasondeza kuni.

Kubafundi aboyikayo ukuziveza ukuba bakhanuka abantu abafana nabo, ndithi mabangabi neentloni. Awunakuguquka kwinto oyiyo. Xa uziva ukuba ukhanuka abantu abafana nawe yaye ungaqondi ukuba kwenzeka ntoni, zama ukufumana abantu abanokukunceda. Zazise kubo ukuze ufumane ulonwabo.

Zininzi izinto eziluncedo ngokuba ngumntu okhanuka abantu abafana nawe. Bayevana gqitha abantu abanjalo. Ndazi abantu beendawo ngeendawo kuba sidalwe ngokufanayo nabo.
Xa ndigodukile, ndiba Iilolo kuba andinako ukuhamba neqabane lam. Ndinokuya naye ekhaya kodwa akukho mntu ndinokumxelela ukuba ungoyena mntu ndizikhethele ukuphila ubomi bam naye. Kubuhlungu oku kuba kufana nokuphila ngobuxoki.

Abahlobo bakhe
URonald wabaxelela abahlobo bakhe ngemeko yakhe. Bothuka gqitha. Bacinga ukuba ndinesifo esibi esifuna ukunyangwa.
Abanye babesithi ndifanele ndiye kwingcali yengqondo okanye nditofwe ukuze ndincedwe. Abantu abakhanuka abantu abafana nabo banyamezela izinto ezininzi. Badla ngokuthukwa nangokubizwa ngamagama amabi - njengokuthi nomntu wonke, banentsholongwane yeHlV okanye bangabantu abohlukileyo ebantwini.

Ndifuna ukuba abantu babamkelele abantu abanjengam. Andizange ndizikhethele ukukhanuka abantu abafana nam, koko ndazalwa ndinjalo. Ndingatsho ukuba ndidalwe ndafana namanye amadoda kodwa ndiya kusoloko ndikhanuka amanye amadoda ngaphakathi - ayinakutshintsha loo nto. Kunzima kuRonald ukukhanuka amanye amadoda abe engumntu ontsundu. Amadoda abelungu akhanuka amanye amadoda ayawacalula amadoda antsundu nawo anjalo, nto leyo yenza kube nzima kuthi bantu abantsundu ukumelana neenkanuko zethu zesondo. Kunzima kuba endaweni yokufumana inkxaso ukhatyelwa phaya kude.

Umyalezo wakhe kubafundi
URonald unomyalezo kwiindidi ezintathu zabafundi. Umyalezo wam kubafundi abakhanuka abantu besinye isini ngowokuba baxhaseni abantu enibaziyo ukuba bakhanuka abantu besini esifana nesabo. Akuyiyo into embi ukukhanuka abantu abafana nawe. Ncedani nibaxhase.
lNational Coalition for Gay and Lesbian Equality inemibutho engama-60 engaphantsi kwayo. llweIa amalungelo amakhanukan odwa kanti ikwajongene neemfuno zawo zemihla ngemihla.

Xa ufuna ukuqhagamshelana nayo, nazi iinombolo onokuyifumana kuzo:
UCandace Blase (lofisi enkulu)
Uphumi Mtetwa (eJohanneburg)
UBronwynne Pereira
(eBhayi)
UShiela Lapinsky (eKapa)
URonald Louw (eThekwini)
(011)4033835

(011) 403 6918 (041) 564905

 

(021) 483 3941 (031) 260 2491





Amakhasi Olutsha
UNGCELELE LWESONDO












Amakhasi Abadala
UMTHETHO
Xa	niceba umtshato wenu, awuqondi ukuba kunokwenzela kubekho into ephosakeleyo. Ukuqhawula umtshato? Oko akunakwenzeka kuwe! Abantu abaninzi baba naloo ngcingane baze balahlekeiwe lukhulu xa sebeqhawula imitshato. UTyhila Ufunde

uqwalasela indlela yokusombulula imicimbi yemali ehambisana noqhawulo-mtshato.

Umtshato noqhawulo-mtshato
U
 mtshato noqhawulo-
mtshato iyanda imitshato egqibela ngokuba iqhawulwe

kule mihla okanye ngokuba iilahleke elinye iqabane. Kwiimeko ezinje kudla ngokuba ngamabhinqa asokola kakhulu. Bashiyeka nabantwana, bengenamali yaye kungekho mntu ufumana umvuzo kusapho.

Ungazithintela njani ezi ngxaki? Kule nyanga siqwalasele iindidi zemitshato ezikwenza ungalahlekelwa yimali kwakufika ixesha lokuwuqhawula. Noqhawulo-mtshato ngokwalo -unowukuqhawula ngaphandle kweendleko xa unalo ulwazi.
Ukutshata
Zininzi izigqibo ekufuneka uzenze xa utshata. Ezinye zezo zinto isenokuba yindawo eniza kuhlala kuyo nezipho ofuna ukuzithenga, kufuneka wenze nesigqibo ngohlobo lomtshato oya kukhusela ingomso lakho nelabantwana bakho.

Abanye basenokukhofelwa ekubeni njengoko betshata ngesintu, awuchaphazeleki zezi ndidi zemitshato. Nangona kunjalo abanye abantu batshata ngesintu baphinde bayotshata ecaweni okanye enkundleni. Oko kuthetha ukuba Ie mitshato iyasebenza. Makhe sijonge imitshato eyahlukeneyo.














Amakhasi Abadala

UMTHETHO

Umtshato wokwabelana (In coni-munity of property)
Abantu abaninzi bazifumana betshate ngomtshato wokwabelana. Oku kubangelwa kukuba abayityikityi iantenuptial contract (ANC). Kwisibini ngasinye kukho izinto eziluncedo neziyingxaki ekutshateni ngolu hlobo. Yiyiphi ekulungeleyo?

Xa utshate umtshato wokwabelana izinto, nantoni na oyifumene ningekatshati noyifumene senitshatile iba yeyenu nobabini. Kwibhinqa elingazusebenza okanye eliza kuhlala ekhaya nabantwana -ngumtshato omhle lo. Xa indoda yakhe iqhawula umtshato, uya kufumana isiqingatha sezinto abanazo.
Kodwa zikho neengxaki zawo. Kumntu oneshishini, lisenokuthatyathwa elo shishini xa iqabane lakhe linamatyala. Ukhumbule ukuba niyabelana kolu hlobo lomtshato ngoko ityala leqabane lakho lityala lenu nobabini.

Antenuptial Contracts (ANCs)
l-Antenuptial Contracts (ANCS) inokutyikitywa ingekafiki imini yomtshato. Lo mtshato usixelela impahla eninayo neqabane lakho, nokuthi kuya kwenzeka ntoni kuyo xa niqhawula umtshato.
Zimbini iindidi zeANC - kukho enezinto ezongezelelwayo nengenazo.

Ante Nuptial Contract - umtshato umntu ojongana nezinto zakhe
Umtshato umntu ojongene nezinto kuthetha ukuba nantoni na iqabane ebelinayo ngaphambi komtshato, iya kuhlala iyeyabo nasemva komtshato. Ngaphezu koko, nantoni na oyithenga nitshatile, iya kuba yeyabo xa sebeqhawule umtshato. Akukho nto nabelana ngayo nangona kunokufuneka uhlawule imali yesondlo.

Olu hlobo lo mtshato lulungile xa isibini sinempahla, yaye nobabini nisebenza ubomi benu bonke. lbhinqa elinamaxesha okungasebenzi ukuze liyofumana umntwana ngoxa indoda iqhubeka nokusebenza, olu hlobo lomtshato lunenkqatho. Ngoxa umyeni efumana imali, umfazi usala eba lihlwempu. l-ANC edibanisa izinto ezongezelelweyo yeyona ilungileyo.

Ante Nuptial Contract enezinto ezongelelwayo
I-Ante Nuptial Contract enezinto ezongezelelweyo ithetha ukuba imali okanye impahla oyifumeneyo okanye oyithenge emtshatweni niza kwabelana ngayo xa niqhawula umtshato.

Ngoku yenza isigqibo ngomtshato okufaneleyo. Cebisa aba bantu balandelayo ukuba bafanele batshate hlobo luni.

Umsebenzi
1.	UTebogo uyatshata ngoDisemba. Ukhulelwe yaye uceba ukufumana abanye abantwana ababini. Emva koko uya kubuyela emsebenzini. Nguwuphi umtshato omfaneleyo?

2.	Uyise kaMary usandul 'ukusweleka yaye umshiye nendlu yakhe. Uceba ukutshata yaye ufuna indlu ihlale iyeyakhe. Nangona eza kusebenza naxa setshatile, ufuna ukungabi nengxaki yemali xa kunokwenzeka uqhawuke umtshato wakhe. Ufanele atshate hlobo luni?

3.	UGugu uneminyaka eliqela engasebenzi. Uyanqwenela ukusebenza kodwa akawufumani umsebenzi. Kutshanje, uThemba ucele ukumtshata. Ufuna ukwenza isigqibo sokuba baza kutshata njani. Ungamcebisa ngelithini?



		BONA XHOSA - September 1996 13

14 BONA XHOSA - Septernbet 1996

	Kubhale uUna Seery. lfoto yeGay Pride March yisifumene kwioutright Magazine

		BONA XHOSA - September 1996 1 7

	AhakwaMoM PaiJer hantiwenelela iBoNa emiiiye iminyaka engama40 yempumelo

	Esi sihlomelo sibhalwe kwiMondi Rotogloss 55 gm2

