zulu.680.depression
Ukufisa
ukufa
U-SARAH ushintshe kakhulu. Le ntokazi eyasiza uKelly Khumalo eqala ukucula ngo-2005 isisindo sayo sehle ngaphezulu kuka-20kg kanti manje ibukeka incane kakhulu kuneminyaka yayo.
Uneminyaka engu-31 manje uSarah kanti ubezigqaja ngokuthi uyakwazi ukwenza izinto azithandayo. Inhloso yakhe ukusiza abanye abatshele ngokukhandleka kwengqondo nokuzibulala.
"Ngavula inkampani yami yokuphatha imicimbi ngineminyaka engu-21 ngashada nomuntu engangimthanda ngineminyaka engu-23. Emva kweminyaka embalwa ngasiza u-Elle noKelly Khumalo beqala ukucula.
"Omunye umuntu wayengazitshela ukuthi nginakho konke engangikufuna. Kodwa kwakunento eyayiyisifuba sami eyayingidla eyagcina ingilimazile.
"Sengizame kathathu ukuzibulala, okokugcina kwenzeke ngoMay kulo nyaka. Manje sekuyangikhanyela ukuthi lokho ngikwenze ngoba ngingafuni ukubheka izidingo zami. Inhliziyo yami yayibuhlungu kangangoba ngaze ngenza into embi kakhulu ngokukhiphela ubuhlungu engangibuzwa kwabanye abantu," kusho yena."
Ngezinye izinsuku wayengavuki nasembhedeni.
NgamaSAMA ka-2006, wayehlele ukwenzela uKelly enye ingubo kanokusho efana nayemenzele yona kumaSAMA ka-2005 eyayinobuhlalu ehlose nokuzijabulisa noKelly nabadansi bakhe ngaleyo mpelasonto.
"Ukukhandleka kwengqondo yami kwaqala phansi kanti kwathi lapho sekusele izinsuku ezimbili siye emcimbini ngamthumelela iSMS ngamtshela ukuthi ngeke ngisakwazi ukumthungela ingubo yakhe nokuya kuma-awards. Leyo mpelasonto ngayichitha embhedeni ngiphatheke kabi ngokudumaza uKelly."
Njengoba kwakonakele empilweni yakhe, kwamkhanyela uSarah ukuthi ayikho into ayeseyenza ngendlela efanele.
"Ngangifisa ukufa kanti ngangifuna ukuzibulala ngento eyayingeke ingihluphe."
Waphuza amaphilisi okulala ezama ukuphuma empilweni ayesehluleka wukuyilawula. Emva kwezinsuku ezimbalwa, wabona incwadi ethi Finding Your Way Through Depression ebhalwe nguPam Rosewell Moore.
"Ngayifunda ngaphindelela ngezwa ukuthi ithemba liyabuya," kusho kukhumbula yena.
Wayeneminyaka engu-12 ngesikhathi eqala ukuzama ukuzibulala.
"Nganginovalo lokuthi ngibaphoxile abazali bami. Ngangibona sengathi kukhona okushaya amanzi ngempilo yami," kusho kukhumbula yena.
Kwakufanele avuse odadewabo ababili abancane ubaba wabo ezobathatha abayise esikoleni. Kodwa ngalolo suku bazumeka.
"Ngaphaphamiswa wumsindo wemoto kababa iduma. Wathetha ngacabanga ukuthi uzongishaya. Kunalokho wavele waphuma wahamba.
"Ngavele ngangena ekamelweni labazali bami ngavula eshalofini ngabheka amaphilisi. Ngawathatha ngale kokucabanga ngawaphuza.
"Akuzange kwenzeke lutho. Sengiwaphuzile, ngalungiselela ukuya esikoleni."
Esefikile esikoleni waphathwa yisiyezi walunywa yisisu. Emva kwalokho waquleka.
Waphuthunyiswa esibhedlela waphaphama ntambama ngalolo suku. "Abazali bami abazange basho lutho kanti namanje abakaze babuze ukuthi kwakonakelephi," kusho yena.
KUSUKELA esemncane uSarah bekumhlupha ukuthi akenzi okwanele ngokukaDkt uJason Ross ongumeluleki owakhuluma nabakwaBONA ngemvume kaSarah. NgokweSA Depression & Anxiety Group (SADAG), baningi abantu abasha abangazithembi ngenxa yengcindezi ababhekene nayo. Eminyakeni engu-14 edlule sikhuphukile isibalo sezingane ezineminyaka engu-10 kuya ku-14 ezizibulalayo.
Bekuphakathi kuka-2005 ngesikhathi umngani kaSarah emtshela ukuthi kungenzeka ukuthi ukhandleke ngokwengqondo. "Isimo sempilo yami ngangibona singaphezu kwamandla ami. Ngangibona sengathi akukho engingakwenza ngaso."
U-Sarah wabona ukuthi unenkinga ngempela emva kokuba umyeni wakhe, avuma ngokwakhe ukuthi wayemhlukumeza, wamthumelela i-e-mail ekhala ngempatho yakhe. Wasukuma, wafunda izincwadi ezazichaza kahle ngenkinga yakhe waqala ukwelulekwa ngo-April 2006.
"Ngacabanga ngajula ngayo ngezwa ngikhululeka uma ngithola ukuthi ngasohlangothini lwezempilo ikhona incazelo yesimo engangikusona," kusho yena.
U-Sarah ukholwa wukuthi ubekhandleke impilo yakhe yonke kodwa engasiqondi isifo sakhe. Wazithola esehlukumeza abantu naye abuye ahlukunyezwe.
"Ukungazithandi kwami kwenza ngazonda abanye abantu. Ngangiphila emhlabeni wami ngedwa!
"Umuntu owayezama ukungeluleka ngangikhwela ngidilike kuyena. Nganginekhanda eliqinile, ngizikhukhumeza, ngidelela, ngihlulela abanye, ngingalaleli muntu.
"Abantu ngangibaphoxa ngibabukela phansi ngingenandaba nokuthi ngibaphatha kanjani."
Wasebenzisa amaphilisi okulwa nokukhandleka asiza ngokuvuselela ingqondo esuke ikhathele.
Kodwa izinkinga zikaSarah zazingakapheli. Wathatha ikhefu lonyaka emsebenzini ukuze alulame ahlele nempilo yakhe kabusha. Wadivosa ngaleso sikhathi nomyeni wakhe.
"Izinkinga emshadweni wami zaqala sengizitshela ukuthi sezizophela njengoba ngangingasenalo udlame ekhaya," kusho yena.
"Engakwenza kumyeni wami kwenza ukuba angizonde kakhulu. Kwaba nguyena owayesengihlukumeza ngokomoya nangokwengqondo."
NgoMay kulo nyaka, uSarah wathola ukuthi indoda ayethi ilubambo lwakhe, eyayimphelezela uma eyolulekwa, yayithandana nomfundi wasenyuvesi oneminyaka engu-18.
"Umqondo owawungifikele kwaze kwaba yikabili empilweni yami wabuya ngamandla. Kwafika ukuthi angivele ngiqede ngempilo yami.
"Ngangingedwa ekhaya ngathatha ummese ngawubeka esihlakaleni ngaphuza amaphilisi ekhanda awu-10."
KWATHI uma ebona ukuthi udinga usizo, washayela umngani wakhe ucingo, washayela nomeluleki wakhe nomfundisi webandla lakhe.
NgokweSADAG, abantu abazibulalayo baba nezimpawu abakhombisa ngazo kumalungu omndeni noma kubangani ukuthi bafuna ukuzibulala. Yingakho nje ngokukaDkt. uRoss imizamo yokuzibulala ithathwa njengendlela yokucela usizo kanti kubalulekile ukuthi nimsize lowo muntu.
Abantu abazama ukuzibulala badinga usizo lochwepheshe ukuze baqhubeke nempilo ngokweSADAG. Ngokwesixwayiso sayo, baphakathi kuka-20% no-50% abantu abazibulalayo abake bazama ukuzibulala.
Ngesikhathi umeluleki wakhe, umyeni wakhe nasebenza nabo bezama ukugqekeza ekhaya likaSarah ngenhloso yokumsiza, waphinda wazama ukusika izihlakala zakhe kodwa bambamba.
"Uma sibheka udaba lukaSarah, ukuzama kwakhe ukuzibulala kukhomba ukuthi wayeselahle ithemba ngempilo. Ngikhumbula ukuthi ngamthethisa emva kwalokho," kusho uDkt. uRoss.
"Akukho muntu engimbeka icala ngokuzama kwami ukuzibulala. Ngikholwa wukuthi wukungabi nalwazi ngendlela ingqondo esebenza ngayo okwaba yisitha sami kodwa sengingcono ngoba sengiyazi ngokukhandleka kwengqondo."
"Kodwa iningi labantu abamnyama alinalwazi ngale nkinga. Abanolwazi nasebethola ukwelashwa abakhulumi ngayo kanti balwa nayo ngokuyimfihlo.
"Ukungazi ngokukhandleka kwengqondo kwenza ukuba kubhebhetheke. Kunganqandeka ngokuba nolwazi nangokutholakala kwako ukuze umuntu alashwe." [z]
BONA ZULU October 2008
Kwakubukeka sengathi izinto zimhambela kahle uSarah Shongwe, wayeshade nomuntu amthandayo, enenkampani yakhe eyayimngenisela izigidi zemali abuye abe yimenenja kaKelly Khumalo no-Elle. Pho yini eyamenza wazama ukuzibulala kathathu? Indaba nguPatricia McCracken, izithombe ngu-Andrea Caldwell
IMPILO LEYO
Isisindo sikaSarah sakhuphuka ngo-20kg esakhandleke ngokwengqondo (ngenhla kwesobunxele), manje sesikahle (kwesobunxele). Kumphatha kabi ukuthi abaculi bakhe, u-Elle noKelly bathikanyezwa yizinkinga zakhe.
IZINDAWO ZOSIZO
SADAG Mental Health Line: 011-262-6396; www.anxiety.org.za
LifeLine: 011-715-2000; www.lifeline.org.za
Suicide Line: 0800-567-567
BONA ZULU October 2008
BONA ZULU October 2008
KUYINI UKUKHANDLEKA KWENGQONDO?
Abantu ababalelwa ku-6% - cishe abangu-340 million emhlabeni wonke - ababa nohlobo oluthile lokukhandleka kwengqondo empilweni ngokweSADAG. Kodwa bacishe babe yingxenye yokubili kokuthathu abangatholi ukwelashwa ngendlela efanele.
E-SA u-60% wabantu abazibulalayo usuke ukhandleke ngokwengqondo. Ukukhandleka ngokwengqondo okugulisayo kuhlukile kunokuzizwa "uphansi" - kodwa kufanele usukume uma kuze kuphela amasonto amabili uzizwa uphansi.
NgokweSADAG, kungenzeka ukuthi ukhandleke ngokwengqondo uma kuphela amasonto amabili noma ngaphezulu uphatheke ngale ndlela:
Uzwa sengathi kukhona isono osenzile
Ungazethembi ubona uyisahluleki
Unemibono engabambeki ngezinto ozozenza
Uzizwa ukhathele
Ungalali kahle noma ulala kakhulu
Ungakwazi ukugxila emsebenzini noma uhluleka wukubukela iTV
Ucabanga kakhulu umqondo wakho ungakutholi ukuphumula
Inhliziyo yakho ivulekile noma imnyama
Usebenzisa izidakamizwa noma utshwala
Uthanda ukwenza izinto eziyingozi
Ungenandaba nezinto owawuthanda ukuzenza, uthanda ukuhlala wedwa
Ucabanga ngokufa noma ngokuzibulala.
NgokweWorld Health Organisation, emhlabeni abantu bazibulala njalo ngemizuzwana engu-40, kanti njalo ngemizuzwana emithathu kusuke kukhona abazama ukuzibulala.
