zulu.693.lobola_2
IMALI
isithathe
indawo YEZINKOMO
UPHENYO LUKABONA
UZWELIBANZI DAMBA oneminyaka engu-29 uliqhamukisa eCape Town kanti ufuna ukushada ngokwesintu. Ufuna ukulobola umakoti wakhe.
Uma kulotsholwa kukhishwa izinkomo kodwa uDamba uzolobola ngemali. Yena nabasekhweni lakhe bavumelana ngokuthi kufanele akhokhe u-R40 000 njengemali yelobolo.
UDamba akavumelani nabathi isiko lokulobola seliyafa kanti akakugxeki nokwenziwa uma kulotsholwa.
Ngokusho kwakhe akaboni kukuhle ukukhipha izinkomo ekhweni lakhe ngoba bahlala elokishini abanayo indawo yokuzifuya.
"Esikhathini esizayo abantu bazofuna ukulotsholelwa ngama-Mercedes Benz noma ngamatshe aligugu," kusho uDamba.
Leso sikhathi akhuluma ngaso sesifikile ngoba kwezinye izindawo sekubizwa izitofu, amafriji namaTV uma kulotsholwa.
Ukuhlonipha amasiko sekusho enye into kanti amasiko asehambisana nezikhathi njengoba sesibona izizukulwane ngezizukulwane zifaka okuthile kuwona. Kodwa kwenzekani uma isiko lishintshwa liba enye into - njengoba sibona isikhathi sikaKhisimusi sesiphendulwa isikhathi sokuchitha imali kunokuthi kuqhakanjiswe ukuzalwa kweNkosi uJesu Khrestu.
Njengoba sonke sazi, ngelobolo kusuke kuhloswe ukuhlanganisa imindeni emibili. Ngalo, umkhwenyana nabakubo basuke bebonga umndeni kamakoti beqinisekisa ukuthi bazomnakekela.
Kodwa abagxekayo bathi baningi asebekhohliwe wukuthi kwakuhlosweni ngelobolo.
"Kwakuba yinto yomndeni," kusho uProfessor Sheila Meintjies, ofundisa ezepolitiki e-University Of The Witwatersrand oseke wabhala ngezithinta ubulili.
Uthi ngokomlando ilobolo laliwuphawu lokuhlanganisa imindeni emibili esivumelwaneni esasiba yisiqiniseko sokushada kwababili libuye livikele umakoti.
"Isivumelwano kwakuba esokuthi umndeni kamkhwenyana uzonakekela umakoti impilo yakhe yonke.
"Uma lokho kungenzeki, umakoti wayephindela ekhaya lapho ezalwa khona."
Kodwa uMeintjies uthi isithunzi selobolo sehle emva kwezinguquko ezenziwe abantu emasikweni.
Umndeni kamkhwenyana usubona ukulobola kuyindlela abakamakoti abanikela ngayo ngendodakazi yabo emzini ukuze ibe yisigqila sabo.
"Bekubonakala kuyindlela yokuthenga umakoti," kusho yena - abesimame bethengwa ngezinkomo nemali ukuze basebenze bazale kuqhakanjiswe ukuthi umakoti ushadele ukunakekela umkhwenyana wakhe nomndeni kamkhwenyana.
"Omakoti baba yizigqila ngisho noma sebezele izingane kulowo muzi!" kusho uMeintjies.
Nakuba ehambisana nalolu siko uNosisi Mpolweni ofundisa isiXhosa emnyangweni wezezilimi e-University Of The Western Cape, uyakhala ngendlela abantu abasha ababhekene nenselelo yokuhlanganisa amasiko abaluthatha ngayo.
Uthi akukuhle ukuthi abesilisa bazitshele ukuthi ngalolu siko basuke bethenga umakoti kunokwakha ubuhlobo obuhle emndenini womuntu abashada naye.
Uthi inkinga ngelobolo wukuthi seloniwe wukuhlanganisa amasiko asentshonalanga nawase-Africa nokuyinto esho ukuthi umshado awusenasisekelo.
Abanye abantu abasha abahambisani nalolu siko.
UNhlanhla Dlamini (25), owenza izifundo zomthetho e-University Of Cape Town, uthi akahambisani nelobolo ngoba lenza kube sengathi owesimame uyadayisa.
"Angisiboni isidingo sokukhokhela uthando ngoba lumahhala."
Uthi imali idala izinkinga.
"Abakubo kamkhwenyana basuke bacabange ukuthi banamandla okuhlukumeza umakoti ngoba bemkhiphele imali."
Kodwa uNosisi uthi kukhona okungadala izinkinga ngalo mbono kaNhlanhla. Uthi abesimame abasha abangama-Africa abangenandaba namasiko nabangafuni nokuyizwa indaba yelobolo basengozini yokwaliwa nokuhlukunyezwa abantu abashade nabo.
Amadoda abashade nawo azobabona bengenasithunzi bengabalulekile empilweni yawo. Kodwa ngabe izithandani zingathatha siphi isinyathelo uma imindeni ibiza imali yelobolo enkulu njengoba isimo somnotho sibheda nje" Ngabe zingaki ezingakhetha ukubaleka zizishadise ngaphandle kokuthola izibusiso nokuxhaswa yimindeni yazo"
Yizinto ezinjengalezi uMeintjies athi seziphendule ilobolo zalenza laba yindlela yokucindezela kugqilazwe omakoti kunokuthi libavikele kanti libabeka engozini yokuba bahlukunyezwe.
U-Meintjies uthi umthetho olawula ezamasiko awunamandla okuvikela abesimame ekuhlukunyezweni, kodwa kulelizwe elibusa ngokwentando yeningi amalungelo abesimame aqinisekisiwe kumthethosisekelo.
I-Domestic Violence Act ka-1998 ichaza udlame lwasekhaya njengokuhlukumeza ngokomzimba, ngokwengqondo ngokomnotho nangokwezinto eziphathekayo kanti inhloso yayo wukuvikela abesimame. Amaphoyisa aphoqwa ngumthetho ukuba avikele abesimame.
"Amaphoyisa akufanele atshele owesimame ohlukunyezwayo ukuthi akazame ukuzixazululela ngokwakhe izinkinga zakhe nomyeni wakhe - lokho akukho emthethweni. Kufanele athole usizo lokuvikelwa kumyeni wakhe noma esokeni lakhe."
Uma ubheka lezi zinto, ubeka emqondweni nokuthi labo abakholwa wukuthi abesimame bayizinto zokuphathwa budlabha, ngabe sisekhona isidingo selobolo"
Baningi abathi makuqhutshekwe nelobolo kodwa kubuyiswe leso sithunzi esasikhona esikhathini esidlule uma kulotsholwa.
UMulalo Nemavhandu, weJohannesburg Kara Heritage Institute, ekhuthaza ukugcinwa kwamagugu namasiko uthi lolu siko aluhlanganise lutho nemali kodwa luqinisa ubuhlobo bemindeni emibili kanti yilokho okufanele kukhuthazwe.
Ukwenziwa kwezinguquko kulolu siko kungenza ukuba abantu bangazibophezeli emishadweni yabo badivose kalula kanti ukudivosa esikhathini esidlule bekungesiyo neze into elula abashadile bezama ngayo yonke indlela ukuxazulula izinkinga zabo.
Okumqoka wukukhumbula ukuthi ilobolo alisho ukuthi umuntu useyimpahla yakho. [z]
West Cape News
Indaba: Brenda Nkuna
Ngabe ilobolo lisenendawo kwiSouth Africa yanamuhla" Ngabe amanani abizwayo ngelobolo aphezulu noma aphansi"Ngabe yiziphi izinto ezibalulekile ekuxoxisaneni ngelobolo" Ngabe wena yisiphi isipiliyoni onaso ngendaba yelobolo"
Sibhalele usazise ngovo lwakho ngalolu daba. Ikheli lithi: Letters To The Editor, Box 32083, Mobeni, 4060.
KUKHOKHWA MALINI"
Esikhathini esidlule ilobolo laliba yindlela yokuhlanganisa imindeni kodwa kubukeka sengathi abantu sebelisebenzisela ukuzinothisa kanti abashadikazi abaningi bashada becwile ezikweletini. Ngabe lokho kwamukelekile" Ngabe ilobolo seliphelelwe yisithunzi" Sicubungula lolu daba oluyindida
Asikho isidingo soku-thenga uthando ngoba luma-hhala
